In my lifetime I have had, maybe, four boyfriends before dating Big Strong Man at 25. My longest relationship came in at a solid 3 months. It wasn't that I had little or no interest in relationships, it was just that I was shy and didn't have many suitors.
When I was 17, I did this crazy thing and pledged my virginity to my husband- which was to assume (and hope and pray) that one day I would, indeed, be married. I signed my name on the True Love Waits line and made a declaration for what I believed would honor God, myself, my husband our children, and a legacy of children thereafter.
Here's the thing about Annie's devotional today: I have such little practice with dating.
I "dated Jesus" for years because it was a good-ish explanation for why I did not have a boyfriend and it also served a a fantastic barrier when I was, very infrequently, approached by someone I was not interested in.
****
Dating Jesus. Yes, this is an actual term.
One "dates Jesus" while he or she is focusing
on Jesus and not on seeking to date someone.
It is a season set-apart to seek Him and to find
fulfillment in Him.
One "dates Jesus" while he or she is focusing
on Jesus and not on seeking to date someone.
It is a season set-apart to seek Him and to find
fulfillment in Him.
****
Big Strong Man and I began dating and were married all within 11 months. It was a whirlwind. We got married in a fever...like Johnny Cash and June Carter. I suppose.
But marriage has been so much more difficult than I ever thought it would be. More than I thought it should. In my romanticized notions, I thought our infatuation, grace, and the "even though we ain't got money, I'm so in love with you, honey" would be enough.
But there have been so many hours spent before counselors. And in tears. So much yelling, sleeping in separate rooms, and and the very rare recurrence of the dreaded D-word. You know, the one which is never to be spoken inside of marriage. The "this is not an option" word we all know.
You will learn things about God's love and personality from friendship, dating, and marriage, and fear will try to keep you from giving your heart in those relationships. Don't let fear win. ...put yourself out there. (for the daters) ...keep being brave in your marriage. Give your spouse grace. Be brave enough to be open and communicate your feelings. Don't let the years of hurts and pain put a wall between you. Don't run away when you feel rejected. (for the married)
Be Brave:
Oh y'all are gonna love this one.
Married friends, ask your spouse on a date.
Single friends, ask someone to coffee.
Like, someone who could be someone.
Be brave. Go for it! It's just coffee.
My birthday falls during this end of the year whirlwind. All of Jesus' favorites share His birthday month. Big Strong Man wanted to do something real nice for me.
He wanted to buy me something.
He wanted me to relax.
In the end, he asked me what I wanted and my answer was simple:
pajamas and hot cocoa
Christmas music and a full tank of gas
three little men that we get to call ours
A date. That was what I desired most. It wasn't romantic-exactly. There was no wine. I did not shave my legs for the occasion. But it was wonderful regardless.
Advent Day 7:
The Babe
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