Mourn Dreams That Have Died, Day 28: 100 Days to Brave

"The dreams you thought would come true in a certain time frame never did. You saw a life for yourself that you will never have. You can mourn that loss."

quotestopics.com

My sister-in-love died in 2013. It's been five years and a few months since she went to be with Jesus. She got sick on a Sunday and was gone on a Thursday.
My step-father got sick, seemingly out of the blue, and he passed on from Pancreatic Cancer within two years of his diagnoses.
My friend lost his son in a car accident. It was near the holidays and someone turned when she shouldn't have, hitting my friend's vehicle and his sweet son passed away from it all. He was just a little guy.

And in each circumstance, we cry. We cry with the hurt of loss, and the unfairness of there never being enough days, time, "I love yous". We cry and yell and allow so much to come out of us, but what about that which remains inside of us still?

Today Annie encourages us to mourn the loss of our own, personal XYandZs. 

To feel the pit, acknowledge it, and to grieve or lament for the dead.

The dead.

It is haunting to write because I think we mostly relate it to humanly death, which is entirely bittersweet for a believer and his family.

There are others areas to mourn as well.
Mourning the loss of good health...
...having one's own children...
...a career...
...a dream.

And it is here, in the midst of the areas we have perhaps buried -certainly ignored- that we see them for what they could have been, and mourn the loss of them.

Be Brave: 

What dead dream do you need to mourn? 

For me it is the dream of having an Emmaline Katherine: The name for the daughter I may never have.

I have mourned my Emmaline many times, sometimes just the thought of never knowing what a biological daughter might look like is difficult for me. Or having such a beautiful name and no little girl to bless it upon. 

With each of my three pregnancies I have carried Emmaline around with me in the event that baby was to be a girl. 

And I am happily a "boy mom" and adore these three little dudes, but it does not mean that my heart does not sometimes hurt for what could have been. Always in addition to, never instead of, how lovely it could have been to have had my Zeplin, Demetri, Thatcher AND my Emmaline. 

What do you need to mourn over? 

"It's easy to take the unanswered prayers and disappointments in our lives and brush them under the rug so we don't have to think about them. But you know what, friend? It's okay to mourn your dreams that have died. Looking at those dreams takes bravery. But when you look them in the face, head-on, and let them go, you will see how God's plan for your life, although different from what you expected, is a beautiful story of its own that you never could have dreamed up for yourself." -Annie