Taking the Morning by Storm: A practice of Preparedness

Good morning, friends.
As I type, it is early morning and I have to keep turning my 7-year old away with soft reminders of,
"you can rest or play in your room, but this is mommy's time".

Last week I began a devotional and with it, the practice of getting up earlier than usual to great the day and carve-out that sacred space of time. Time for God and me to show-up, together. Time to reflect without trying to break-up an argument, help look for a lost shoe, or get another cup of milk for anyone.
My time.

The devotional I am reading is called Grouchy to Great: Finding Joy in the Journey of Motherhood, by Ruth Schwenk. My friend Danielle, who is a pistol, loaned it to me, like a gem. She saw me the other day and asked so excitedly, "don't you just love it?". I like it, but more than the book itself, I love what it is producing in me.

This sacred morning practice is refreshing. It is an extra hour otherwise forgotten and wildly neglected to my never-ending desire to sleep. It is the excitement with which I get up to the sound of my alarm, and not the dread. The pep feeding my step, and not the internal begging of another 5 minutes.

I thought it would be so much harder.

Most days the devotional comes with a Bible verse to reflect upon, or one is summed-up in the day's segment. Today's was James 1:19,

Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: you must be quick to listen, 

slow to speak and slow to get angry. Human anger does not produce the 

righteousness God desires. So get rid of all the filth and evil in your lives, 

and humbly accept the word God has planted in your hearts, 

for it has the power to save your souls. 

(emphasis mine)

This has been a season of forgetting, maybe neglecting, the fact that God has planted a word in my heart. It has not been fully by will, as if I just ignored it, but I think I have forgotten. I think I have not been paying enough attention, caring enough to pull-out the overgrown weeds. 

But today I care. Here I am, showing up to my own life. 

Daily there is a section of the devotional dedicated to response.
Questions, such as this one:

Am I willing to recognize that I struggle with anger? 

(list specific occurrences, or something that angers you consistently)

And today my response is like a river, flowing out of me like a confessional. 

Yes, I struggle. 

...with unmet expectations...

...high standards...

...selfishness...

...self-pity...

...self-preservation...

...with a loud booming, self-righteous voice...

...with a temper flooding like a monsoon, spilling out in red-hot screaming, pouting, and demands of "leave me alone"...

...spanking in place of timely cuddles and/or simply walking away...

...too much "go" and not enough "slow"
...with disappointment...
...with self-esteem...
...with prioritizing...
...with truth...

This feels sacred to me. Getting up, demanding my body to see that my mind and my heart are ruling over it's demand to have it's way. Spending these first few minuets, and upwards of an hour, reading my devotional, reading my Bible, reflecting on aspects of my life, and giving them, again, over to the Lord.

Today I type out this post. This feels sacred as well, an uprising of something tender and positive. A desire to give life, to the reader and to myself- which is to overflow to my family.

An parent must first apply her own oxygen mask before she can aid her child. 

It seems counter to what comes natural, because the will to save our children, at the extent of ourselves, sometimes comes on so strong- but this comes easiest when the desire to save self isn't so darned overwhelming. I have been drowning in my own life, forgetting that I know how to swim.

Two opposite ends of a magnet, repelling at one another. 

I write and read and reflect because I am those two magnets- so are you. We attract and repel. We stick together with a strong force, and then force one another away in the desperate need to not be near.  And I need both, because I was made for both.
The days can be hectic. Years are too short. My body is changing, reminding me that age is happening, and yet I have this very moment. And I am thankful for it. My desire is to seize it. Make it count.  To live -fully alive- in the mundane, everyday, difficult, and tedious, and live -filly alive- in the extra, the spectacular, the beauty.

Today I see so much beauty. So much potential.
Look at this kiddo, I cannot stop smiling.

I am thrilled with this Little Dude who is so very spirited (a.k.a. LOUD) and darling (a.k.a. SPIRITED).  Do you think when the Lord looks upon us, He sees our spunk? Do you think He cannot stop smiling? Because I do.
I imagine He is simultaneously smiling over our joys and crying over our sins. A miraculous miracle only He can do.

There is an arsenal, a fleet of devotionals I have to take the place of the current one I am reading.
A practice of preparedness. Of self-discipline. Of growth. 

What devotionals do you recommend? Do you have a favorite subject, author, or title? Let us know below- and I may even add it to my line-up!