My fake, acrylic nail.
It came right off.
Blasted thing.
Yesterday was also the first time in a month I opened my doors once again to the mommy group which is supposed to be meeting bi-weekly at my place. And it had been, these last couple of months.
But then the depression came.
And depression is exhausting.
It is exhausting to sleep your day away.
When taking a shower feels like running a marathon.
A new mom came yesterday.
Her name is Joy.
Which is fitting.
She was hippie-like, which goes over well with me.
It's comforting.
She carried her own knife and sheath, which she used to cut her son's apple at my table.
"For future reference, I have knifes", I told her.
Nine moms showed up with our combined 13 children- one is still in-utero.
We split into two groups and Joy was in my group, which delighted me because she is new and I wanted to see what she was about.
We reference the book we are group-reading, Triggers, and attempted to stay on track, but mostly we talked.
About life.
About our own triggers.
And about meal planning- which was a common trigger itself around the mommy group at my table.
"We are not fancy", I stated sincerely at one point.
Sometimes we have hot dogs for dinner twice in a row.
Sometimes a bowl of cereal.
And there were heads nodding as I explained that, sometimes I just need to let the air out.
Which means everyone picks his favorite cereal and there is no complaining, no prep, and little clean up.
As I spoke I menacingly held my left hand up- the hand with the missing nail. I wiggled my fingers a little as well. Not fancy.
I am contemplating what to do about these nails.
Get this one fixed and continue with the fake nails, of remove them all?
I kind of favor the later.
After two months of expensive treatment, time in a stinky nail salon, and never seeing the same girl I did -and loved!- on that second trip, I am kind of over it.
Plus, popping zits and picking up coins are SO HARD with fake nails!
Graciously, I don't have too many zits these days.
Coins...that's another story.
I binge-watched some YouTube videos, probably Sarah's Day because she's a fave, but somehow ended-up watching Alicia Silverstone give a fridge tour. Then I watched a woman named Ellen Fisher and she was prepping dinner with Alicia and they are both Vegans and the rest is history. Ellen has a YouTube channel and she posts about her Hawaiian-living, Vegan-eating, family life. She is so interesting- and I quickly began to remember how I have had this resounding thought in the back of my mind which told me,
"I could totally go vegetarian and be all about it".
And the thought is right. Not Vegan, but Vegetarian.
Anyway, this thought resurfaces time to time when I am cooking with raw meat and the putrid rank makes me want to vomit. Then there is the blood...gag me with a spoon.
I am so over it.
Unfortunately, that means little because Big Strong Man's life mantra includes, Give.Me.All.The.Meats. and he will absolutely, undeniably be 6000% against this.
So I have been a sneaky girl.
Stocking up on veggies and nuts, seeds, and beans.
And my newest Super Food obsession: Spirulina.
Thatcher and I have been including it in our morning smoothies all week. It is a super dark green and not inexpensive- I am hoping it is magical. (Recipes in upcoming posts.)
Becoming a vegetarian is not something new to me. At the end of middle school/ early high school I would only eat chicken and zilch on the other meat-front. Not the same, I know, but it was close enough for me.
This time it is zilch on the entire front.
So far no one has suspected a thing. B.S.M. is none-the-wiser and the boys are used to me eating giant salads while they eat their Manwhich- true story. *wink*
Here is a picture of Thatcher and I: the cool kids (I promise, my hair was actually super cute this day- too bad for me you can't tell.)
Always,
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