In the past few days I have explained the Dinner Club in two separate posts, here and here. What I have not done was explain the terrible mess in which I have found myself in.
A mess by proxy.
I quite fancy less complications.
It started like this: A. and I were talking all, "wouldn't it be nice to have another couple with whom we feel comfortable leaving our Littles so that we can go on a date with our hubbys?". Why yes, that sounds marvy.
We did a looksy at one another and knew just then that WE (!) could be one part of that couple for one another: if our husbands get-on.
So A. invited my beloved family and I over for dinner and our children got on, as did our husbands.
We were like gold, just then. Future nights out, here we come!
But then I got it in my head that I wanted more. What about a Dinner Club with a few other families? What about a variety of friends from whom to call on in an emergency? And what if A. and J. and Big Strong Man and I wanted to go out, together? More was the right course.
A. sounded interested and so I recruited her and her family and, with mine, we had two.
Vacation Bible School happened around this time and the husband of another friend was there with their oldest son while I was there with my three sons. He asked if R. (his wifey) and I had an opportunity to run together yet.
"No, not yet. Pity. I would love to get together with her."
When what to my wondering eyes should I her but, "Let's make that happen. Let's get to two of you together." Excusey-moi?? Yes, please.
Like a lightbulb, something clicked on in my mind and I was all, yes, this couple needs to join us!!
So we were one couple short. 4 couples, that sounds like gold, right? Agreed.
As church was ending the next week, Big Strong Man called me over to meet a couple he was doing the Connection class with. (Connection class is an introductory class to what our church offers by way of ministries, and how people can get involved.) Let me type this again, largly: HE invited ME to meet others. He found the couple FIRST. He started this.
Of course the couple is lovely and the wifey, D., was all, "we have lived here for 7 years but not 'plugged-in' because we have kept close to our friends in B-land (45mins away). We are now 2 children deep and are ready to actually know our neighbors."
And I was all, "how about a Dinner Club?" And she was all, "Oh. My. Gosh. I have always dreamed of doing a diner club! Yes!"
It was magic.
Four couples, nine children, once a month, rotating dinners.
Perfect, right?
Well, no, not quite, and here is why.
B.
My dear, dear, bestest friend in G-land (where we live).
Somehow my brain went on a safari without me and I completely forgot about her.
Somehow, she didn't cross my mind until DAYS LATER when we had made plans to meet-up and I was all, "Oh no! B...." (Imagine Ralphie from A Christmas Story saying "balls". BbbAaaWwwLllLllSss......)
At this point I have tried repeatedly to win my husband over on the side of "just one more couple", but he is firmly sitting on "no". (Or as my bestie British teenage girl friend, Georgia Nicholson would say, "he has eschewed me with a firm hand".)
We had A. and her family over for dinner the other evening and I posed the question to them, "What do the two of you think about adding another couple to the group? Just one more couple?" J., husband of A., looked like he was about to puke and very kindly told me that a) he is feeling quite a little (lot) overwhelmed, and b) he is fairly confident that they have silverware enough only for 8.
Adding another couple is a no.
Georgia, my bestie
So I am in this place of not wanting to have B. find out that she wasn't an original askee. I do not want to hurt her feeling and fear that "I just forgot all about you until we were already at compacity" is not going to go over well.
What is a girl to do?
Naturally, I must speak with her. Invite her out for coffee. Tell her the truth. It will be so much better coming form me than it will be if she finds out from anyone else and feels awkward and hurt towards me. I don't want that.
Hopefully I will have figured out how to speak with B. before too long. A. reassured me (kinda) when she said that, "maybe one of the families will drop out of the group and make room for her." Maybe, but I hope not. I hope we all get-on and become close friends. I hope Dinner Club becomes an event we all really look forward to.
I also hope B. understands and is not upset.
Please, Lord. Please.
Ironically, this sounds like a rut Georgia would find herself in. Too bad I am not le' Lousie Rennison and writing comedic genuis.
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